Ask Me Anything

The only bad question is the one not asked.

Is there something you’ve always wondered, but been too scared to ask? Well, now’s your chance. Ask me anything you would like to know about Kink or BDSM, and I will do my best to answer or point you in the right direction. And don’t worry, all questions are anonymous!

Your question is saved and will appear when it is answered.

Curiosities So Far...

  • Curious Kinkster asked:
    on September 22, 2024 10:59 pm
    As a Domme, if my friend is a sub on trial, uncollared, and her needs aren't being met, and she wants to be my sub, because the trust is there, what is proper protocol? If I also reached out to her perspective Domme, with no response as well?
    • kinkycuriosity replied:
      on September 24, 2024 11:01 am
      This is a situation where she needs to speak to the Dom she is on trial with. She needs to either advise them that her needs are not getting met and then work with them to address those issues, OR advise them that the trial is not working for her and she is stepping away and ending it. That way she would be free to submit to you with no attachments. Just as you would expect her to communicate with you in your dynamic, she has to communicate with the Dom she is on trial with now. As a sub, it's important that she advocates for herself.
  • Curious Kinkster asked:
    on August 8, 2024 4:09 am
    Hi there, I've just started acknowledging I'm a dominant if that's the right term for a new person. I'm intensely drawn to it and to subs. A sub recently approached me and I'm feeling completely useless to the point I'm rejecting her. Not her fault. It's on me. But I feel like I'm navigating through a thick forest getting lost. I don't want to hurry my journey and I'm actually nervous about it all. I feel a non sexual mentor is what I need but being a complete introvert I don't know where or how to even find one I can trust to guide and help me grow. I'm struggling. How do I find a mentor.
    • kinkycuriosity replied:
      on August 14, 2024 9:38 pm
      The best way to find a mentor is to find a group of like minded people, either in person or online, and get to know them. As you learn about them, you can reach out to someone who has the credentials to potentially become a mentor for you. It's not usually an overnight process but the time and energy you put forth in making these connections can open all kinds of doors.
  • Curious Kinkster asked:
    on July 12, 2024 1:28 pm
    i am a newly minted slave to a Master that i have 'known' for over twenty years. He has just come back into my life and i have willingly submitted myself to Him. The problem is, my history with Him and now His Ownership of me ...i am in love with Him. Is it wrong to tell your Master you love Him?
    • kinkycuriosity replied:
      on July 14, 2024 2:17 pm
      Is it wrong? The short answer is no. However, as with all relationships, the longer you wait to say the L word, the more confirmation you have that it's not just infatuation. Because submission requires one to be more vulnerable than they are typically used to, these feelings can appear faster and stronger than you may typically expect. I would caution you to be mindful of this and give it time. Time may not change anything except the fact that you are more sure than you are today. But at least you will allow those feelings to mature instead of take them at face value.
  • Curious Kinkster asked:
    on May 25, 2024 1:26 pm
    Hi. On your vetting page, you include the following "I compiled a list of questions from multiple posts on Instructor144’s Tumbler page" and link to his page. I think you might consider editing that page. He's been gone from Tumblr since, I think, some time in 2022 or early 2023. So far as I can tell, he hasn't rebuilt a presence there. Which is a huge shame, and a loss for the community. In any event, the link you have returns a "Not Found" error from Tumblr. I love what you're doing here! Thank you!
    • kinkycuriosity replied:
      on May 25, 2024 1:57 pm
      I found and updated the link to his new tumbler page. Thank you!
  • Curious Kinkster asked:
    on May 17, 2024 12:54 am
    yes
  • Curious Kinkster asked:
    on May 16, 2024 1:45 pm
    I am a dom\daddy and my wife is a submissive brat and I am wanting to know and understand what that is and what she likes she won't tell me nothing so I am trying to find out for myself
    • kinkycuriosity replied:
      on May 16, 2024 4:17 pm
      A brat is a type of a submissive who likes to be reminded of their place. They typically enjoy pushing buttons to trigger a strong reaction of the Dominant that will correct their actions and set them straight. This, in turn, will reinforce the power exchange between the Dom and sub, and place the sub in a strong submissive headspace. It can be a bit of a cat and mouse game. And IF you enjoy this type of interaction, it's safe to say you would also fit the Description as a Brat Tamer. But be careful, because not everyone enjoys taming a brat is who always looking to test boundaries. It can be a bit tiresome, on the Dom side, for some. This is something you need to discuss and negotiate with her about. Find out what her main kinks are. Does she want to be put in her place? Does she just enjoy the chase. Is she wanting true punishment for pushing your boundaries or is she wanting a play punishment where it's all apart of the game, and it's secretly a punishment (aka funishment) she enjoys. Don't forget to cover your boundaries too. When you have a brat, it can be a lot. But communicating and making sure you are both on the same page can make it safe and enjoyable for each of you.
  • Curious Kinkster asked:
    on May 7, 2024 8:31 pm
    What kind of impact (not what toys, but what kind… like thuddy pain, or stinging things) leave bruises the easiest?
    • kinkycuriosity replied:
      on May 9, 2024 3:25 pm
      This is very relative to each individual.  Because you aren't really focusing on impact, you are focusing on marks.  What makes you mark, might not make me mark.  So that's a big factor.  There's also a difference on who's doing the impact.  Are you planning on doing a scene with a partner, or are you wanting to do self impact? Self impact is way more difficult to mark yourself compared to doing a scene with a partner.  It also depends on how much pain you can handle.  IMPACT HURTS.  A lot of times, people have to work up their pain tolerance to be able to get marks they want.  Because the amount of pain you have to tolerate to get marks or bruises, can be more than you can handle. But all that aside, you can get marks with both stingy and thuddy implements.  I would say, self impact is easier to get marks with heavier, thuddier impacts, while with a partner, you can do either.  But it really does come down to a lot of different factors.
  • Curious Kinkster asked:
    on April 25, 2024 11:57 pm
    I have always been kinky and submissive but lately I've seemed to develop a incredibly troubling urge and I'm not sure what to do about it. I've had a ws kink for a while but it was just the idea of being marked by someone like I'm their priority. But recently it's kinda evolved into wanting more then just being mark. Recently I've had the urge to let men pee inside my holes and even have thought about going as far as being degraded to the point of licking urinals. I'm not sure what to make of all this or if I should act on any of these newly found kinks. It's very embarrassing to talk about so I can't exactly ask people in my life.
    • kinkycuriosity replied:
      on May 2, 2024 6:36 pm
      Safety has to always be a priority when it comes to our kinks. There are general risks when it comes to water sports, like making sure the urine has no infections or bacteria in it. But taking it a step further to doing degradation in an uncontrolled environment, can be very dangerous. I would recommend if you want to explore these kinks, do it with someone you trust, somewhere you know that cleanliness is a priority. But aside from that, be kinky. And have fun.
  • Curious Kinkster asked:
    on March 10, 2024 6:42 pm
    I have to cover my bottom tonight from a long hard spanking with the paddle, stick, and belt and I have marks how can I cover them up?
    • kinkycuriosity replied:
      on March 10, 2024 6:46 pm
      Wear some pants.
  • Curious Kinkster asked:
    on March 6, 2024 4:34 pm
    I’m freshly into bdsm but I’ve seen videos that are so intense and I want to try but should I start the intensity right away? Or go slow?
    • kinkycuriosity replied:
      on March 6, 2024 6:11 pm
      There are many reasons why jumping into kinks that are more intense when you are brand new isn't a good idea. Kinks are fun, and they can lead to some incredible feel-good body chemicals. But when you are new to the scene and you don't have a solid foundation of trust, communication, knowledge, or a safety mindset, you are setting yourself up for major pains, hurts, harms, or trauma.  You are setting yourself up for the potential of getting sub-frenzy. You are walking into a situation without being informed of all the things that could go wrong or how to handle something that happens unexpectedly. You are not preparing for the deep emotional drops that can happen after intense scenes while having no support or knowledge to help you get through them. It's incredibly risky, not recommended, and could do way more harm than good.