The Jerk Test

A person bumps into you and does not apologize. Your move?

Give them a confused blink.

Bump them back with matching energy.

Let it go and continue on with your day.

Say “Excuse you.”

Say “Excuse me.”

A person keeps talking during an at-home movie. What is your move?

Pause the movie and stare at them until they notice.

Glance over at them.

Ignore it.

Say “Can you not?” in a quiet but deadly voice.

Whisper “Shh.”

Someone asks what you want to eat and then rejects every suggestion. You…

Keep trying.

Tell them to make the decision.

Suggest something simple.

Ask what they want instead.

Say “You know what, you eat air.”

Someone asks for your honest opinion but your opinion is negative. What do you do?

Soften the truth.

Give a gentle answer.

Give the truth without care.

Give the truth with care.

Say “You asked for honesty. Better not cry.”

Someone asks, “Do you mind helping me with something?”

“Sure, what is it?”

“How long will it take?”

“Um, I'd rather not.”

“Of course.”

“Is there anyone else available?”

A person starts venting for 40 straight minutes. What do you do?

Check your phone a few times.

Nod and say “Wow” every so often.

Stop them shortly after they begin and tell them you do not have time for this.

Listen patiently.

Interrupt and ask if there is a shorter version.

You hold the door open for someone and they do not say thank you. Your reaction?

You keep holding it until they walk through.

You purposely shut the door in front of them next time.

You mutter “You are welcome.”

You hold the door just long enough for them to catch the door.

You say “My mistake, I thought you were raised better.”

You are in a group chat. Someone sends a five paragraph message. You…

Skim politely.

React with an emoji and move on.

Reply hours later with “Just saw this.”

Leave the chat and never respond.

Read it fully.

Someone is being dramatic about a minor inconvenience. What do you do?

Listen and show concern.

Ask “Is this the hill you want to die on?”

Let them talk it out.

Say “It is not that serious.”

Offer them a fix so they stop complaining.

Your friend tells a story wrong. What happens next?

You let them talk.

You ask “Do you want the real version or your fan fiction?”

You say “That is not how it went” and fix it.

You retell the entire story properly.

You correct one tiny detail.

A coworker shares a picture of their oddly looking pet. What is your response?

“Why does it look like that?”

“Aww, so adorable.”

“That’s an interesting photo.”

“Nice.”

“Too cute.”

Someone asks a question you already answered. What happens?

You point to where you already answered.

You explain again, but shorter.

You explain again kindly.

You say “I already told you this.”

You do not answer and wait for them to figure it out.

Someone is walking slowly in front of you. What do you do?

Say “Excuse me” then walk around them.

Match their pace and wait patiently.

Pass them dramatically so they know they were the problem.

Gently clear your throat.

Speed-walk past like you are late to a meeting.

Someone you are not fond of calls your name from across the room. You…

Wait a moment before answering.

Pretend you did not hear them until they try again.

Respond immediately.

Look up and wave.

Ignore it completely and keep doing what you were doing.

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