The Bitch Test

Someone tries to drag you into drama that you did not start. What do you do?

Ask for clarification.

Tell them you aren't interested in taking part.

Start more drama.

Interrupt then and shut the whole conversation down.

Ignore it completely.

You receive a text that says “We need to talk.” What is your reaction?

Worry about all the things you know you have done wrong.

“Great. I will bring snacks and honesty.”

Send a text immediately “About what?”

Take a deep breath and reply back “Ok, when?”

Worry about all the things you might have done wrong

A person talks over you. What do you do?

Keep talking louder as if they were background noise.

Say, “Are you done?” once they stop.

Let them finish.

Correct them and let them know you were speaking first.

Pause and take a deep breath while they finish.

Someone lies to you even though you know the truth. What happens?

You ask, “Are you sure?”

You entertain it. “Oh, wow, interesting”

You let it go.

You say, “I will let you rethink that sentence.”

You repeat their lie back to them with a raised eyebrow.

Someone tries to guilt trip you. What is your move?

Point out the clear manipulation.

Say “I am not responsible for that.”

Try to fix it.

Feel awkward.

Respond in a way that makes them second-guess their entire approach.

A stranger cuts in front of you in line. What happens next?

You step closer so they know you noticed.

You let it go.

You move in front of them again with eye contact and zero explanation.

You sigh loudly.

You tap their shoulder and ask if they are lost.

Someone offers advice you did not ask for. Your reaction?

You smile politely.

You pretend to listen, and then come up with an excuse to leave.

You reply with “That is wild considering no one asked your opinion.”

You stare until they get uncomfortable and walk away.

You say “Interesting” and ignore it.

Someone gives you a fake compliment. How do you respond?

“Cute attempt, try again.”

Give them a side eye the whole time.

Give a fake smile and move on.

Say thank you.

“Your acting career needs work.”

Someone tells you to “calm down.” What do you do?

Say “Interesting choice of words.”

Take a deep breath.

Rage out and cause a scene.

Say “I am calm.”

Say “Interesting choice of words.”

When someone is rude to you, your default response is…

Ruin their confidence with one well-timed dig.

Give a short, clipped reply.

Walk away.

Point out exactly what they did.

Offer a polite smile.

Someone says, “You look tired today.” How do you respond?

“Do I? Huh.”

“Amazing. Insult me at breakfast.”

“Thank you for your concern.”

“Funny, I was about to say the same about you.”

“Wow. Brave choice to start your day like this.”

A person keeps bragging. You respond by…

Saying “Good for you.”

Asking, “Does this story get better or can I sit down?”

Listening politely.

Smiling and zoning out.

Letting them know you are suspicious, “Wow that's quite the tale.”

You see someone being dramatic for attention. What do you think?

“I hope they are okay.”

“Here we go.”

“Not my business.”

“I refuse to clap for this performance.”

“They love an audience.”

Someone tries to embarrass you in front of others. What do you do?

Clap back with grace.

Obliterate them with a one line comeback that becomes local legend.

Laugh it off.

Give them a look that says “Noted.”

Change the subject.

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